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Dear Young Me,
 I know you think it can't get any worse right now. But trust me, it's will. My God, it will.
-Older, Considering-Suicide Me
Dear Me,
 Don't be polite and offer him the fudge that's in your dorm room.
- He rapes you.
Dear me,
 Don't cheat on your final exam, you get caught.
-Me after I repeaded my final year
Dear Young Me,
 Go surprise your best friend right now (before she goes to work) and tell her to call in sick to work so you can play hookie together. But you must take her TODAY, September 11th, 2001.
-I never stop missing you
Dear Young Me,
 Don't be afraid to ask for what you want in the bedroom. You will love it when she says yes!
-She will say YES, A LOT.
Dear Young Me,
 Yes, the man who was going to marry you cheated on you with your best friend. And YES, he raped you. The sooner you accept that, the faster you'll go on to have a happy, normal life. And you WILL be normal AND happy!
- Older Self
Dear TSA,
 Groping me and taking naked photos of me at the airport that you will masturbate to later will not stop terrorists. Especially if half of the people that work for TSA look just like the people carrying out Jihad.
-molested airline passenger
Dear Young Me,
 do NOT wear the ring at the big battle. You will regret it
-The older lord Sauron
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